Constant Viewer: Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

First things first. Constant Viewer is constantly harping about movies running over two hours. Well, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End runs 168 minutes, well over two hours, but it doesn't feel long, so CV will hold his tongue. (Actually, a very difficult thing to do, anatomically speaking.) Sure, it could easily have been trimmed, but let's face it, we're talking about a movie based on a Disney theme park ride here, and the third such movie at that. We're talking, in other words, almost literally about a "sit back and enjoy the ride" movie, and sit back and enjoy it you will.

That said, there's little point in dwelling over tedious business like, oh, say, plot. Still, here's the plot outline: Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush), Will Turner (Orlando Bloom)and Elizabeth Swann (Keria Knightley) must sail off the edge of the map to find Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) and fight one last decisive battle. Complications ensue.

But you're not going to see At World's End because of the plot; you're going to go for the action scenes and special effects, for closure from the last two Pirates (the second of which was disappointing) and, most importantly, for yet another fix of Johnny Depp's Jack Sparrow. Depp is one of the most interesting and talented actors of his generation and would have become a major star, anyway, but the first Pirate flick gave him a much wider audience. Appropriately so, because he made that movie entirely his own. Besides, the camera loves him and he's a natural in front of it. That's not to say Depp doesn't work at his craft, but only that he's working with gobs of talent and screen presence, neither of which mere training can recreate or replace. His Jack Sparrow, as a result, is an entirely believable unbelievable character. Okay, so it isn't Hamlet, but neither is Hannibal Lector, if you get CV's drift here.

Really, the film's only true weak point is that Depp is nowhere to be found in the early part of the movie and, once found, isn't around as much in the rest as fans might have wished. CV understands there are all sorts of plot threads that don't concern Sparrow directly and CV is even willing to believe there must be some people who care what happens to Knightley's and Bloom's characters. CV simply isn't to be counted among them.

Otherwise, there's plenty to enjoy. Many buckles get swashed and daring gets done, the sea battles and special effects are splendid and CV found himself almost willing to forgive the gratuitous allusions to current events in the opening scene and Knightley's politically correct heroics later on. The supporting cast is wonderful, even including a cameo role by Keith Richards, claimed by Depp to be part of his inspiration for the Sparrow role (the other part being that suave romantic, Pepe Le Peu). CV couldn't say whether make up was required for Richards's part or not.

Go, see the movie on the big screen. It's a big screen movie. Buy the large popcorn and soda, though. It's a long ride to World's End and back again. Better get some nachos, too.